Sunday, December 5, 2010

The First Christmas Joke - and it's Scottish........

A man in Calgary calls his son in Regina the day before Christmas Eve and says, "I hate to ruin your day but I have to tell you that your mother and i are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough."

"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams.

"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer", the father says. "We're sick of each other and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Stoughton and tell her."

Frantically, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone, "Like hell they're getting divorced", she shouts, "I'll take care of this."

She calls Calgary immediately and screams at her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Done! They're coming for Christmas - and they're paying their own way."

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Source: LDS Living - Healthy Flying

The busiest time for airports is during the winter holidays. Germs that cause the common cold and flu are also hard at work thoughout this time. Here are five ways to fend off flu and cold germs while you fly.

1. Use the airport restroom. Airport bathrooms are cleaner than the ones on the planes, so go before you get on board. This will reduce the amount of toilet trips.

2. Moisturize your nose. Use saline nasal spray, Neosporin, or Vaseline to irrigate and moisturize the mucus membranes in and outside of your nose to protect against nosebleeds and dry cabin air. A dry nose makes it easier for germs to enter.

3. Eat yogurt. According to nutrition research, the beneficial bacteria in yogurt have a protective effect on your immune system and may reduce susceptibility to colds by 25 percent.

4. Remove contact lenses before you fly. If you don't like to fly with contact lenses, take them out in the airport bathroom. Touching your eyes is one way cold and flu viruses make their way through the tear ducts to the nasopharynx--the place where nasal passages meet the mouth and the back of the throat.

5. Travel with your own blanket and pillow. Blankets and pillows offered by airlines can harbor germs, especially cold and flu viruses.


Friday, May 7, 2010

Someone Sent Me - Share 9 "The Seed"

A successful business man was growing old and knew it was time to choose a successor to take over the business.

Instead of choosing one of his Directors or his children, he decided to do something different. He called all the young executives in his company together. He said, "It is time for me to step down and choose the next CEO. I have decided to choose one of you.

The young executives were shocked, but the boss continued. "I am going to give each one of you a SEED today - one very special SEED. I want you to plant the seed, water it, and come back here one year from today with what you have grown from the seed I have given you.

I will then judge the plants that you bring, and the one I choose will be the next CEO."

One man, named Jim, was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed. He went home and excitedly, told his wife the story. She helped him get a pot, soil and compost and he planted the seed.

Everyday, he would water it and watch to see if it had grown. After about three weeks, some of the other executives began to talk about their seeds and the plants that were beginning to grow.

Jim kept checking his seed, but nothing ever grew. Three weeks, four weeks, five weeks went by, still nothing. By now, others were talking about their plants, but Jim didn't have a plant and he felt like a failure.

Six months went by -- still nothing in Jim's pot. He just knew he had killed his seed. Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing. Jim didn't say anything to his colleagues, however.

He just kept watering and fertilizing the soil - He so wanted the seed to grow. A year finally went by and all the young executives of the company brought their plants to the CEO for inspection.

Jim told his wife that he wasn't going to take an empty pot. But she asked him to be honest about what happened. Jim felt sick to his stomach, it was going to be the most embarrassing moment of his life, but he knew his wife was right.

He took his empty pot to the board room. When Jim arrived, he was amazed at the variety of plants grown by the other executives. They were beautiful -- in all shapes and sizes. Jim put his empty pot on the floor and many of his colleagues laughed, a few felt sorry for him!

When the CEO arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted his young executives. Jim just tried to hide in the back. "My, what great plants, trees, and flowers you have grown," said the CEO.

"Today one of you will be appointed the next CEO!" All of a sudden, the CEO spotted Jim at the back of the room with his empty pot. He ordered the Financial Director to bring him to the front. Jim was terrified. He thought, "The CEO knows I'm a failure! Maybe he will have me fired!"

When Jim got to the front, the CEO asked him what had happened to his seed - Jim told him the story. The CEO asked everyone to sit down except Jim. He looked at Jim, and then announced to the young executives, "Behold your next Chief Executive Officer! His name is Jim!"

Jim couldn't believe it. Jim couldn't even grow his seed. "How could he be the new CEO?" the others said. Then the CEO said, "One year ago today, I gave everyone in this room a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today. But I gave you all boiled seeds; they were dead - it was not possible for them to grow.

All of you, except Jim, have brought me trees and plants and flowers. When you found that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you. Jim was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it. Therefore, he is the one who will be the New Chief Executive Officer!"

* If you plant honesty, you will reap trust * If you plant goodness, you will reap friends * If you plant humility, you will reap greatness * If you plant perseverance, you will reap contentment * If you plant consideration, you will reap perspective * If you plant hard work, you will reap success * If you plant forgiveness, you will reap reconciliation * If you plant faith in God, you will reap a harvest. So, be careful what you plant now; it will determine what you will reap later.. "Whatever You Give To Life, Life Will Give Back To You"

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Law of the Garbage Truck

One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us.

My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us.

My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was really friendly. So I asked, 'Why did you just do that?

This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!' This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck.'

He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment.

As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on.

Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets.

The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day.

Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, So ... Love the people who treat you right.

Pray for the ones who don't. Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it!

Sent by ratna kulkarni

Friday, March 26, 2010

Someone Sent Me - Share 8

Compliment people wherever you go. Praise every single thing you see. Be a ray of sunshine to everyone you meet, and make their day better for having seen you.

Say "Thank you" at every turn. Walk, talk, think, and breathe appreciation and gratitude. When you do this, your outer life will change to reflect your inner state of being.

Source: Shared Messenge Sent by Ratna Kulkarni

Monday, March 22, 2010

Wind At Your Back #14

Mosiah 3:19

Historical Setting

King Benjamin taught his people what an angel had taught him the night before.

Doctrinal Teaching

The natural, or fallen, man is an enemy to God. By yielding to the Spirit and becoming like a child, we can overcome the natural man.

Self-Obliged Application

Show your nonmember friends that without the Holy Spirit we are in a fallen, or natural, state and are not close to God.

Personal Application

Listen to the Spirit and be more submissive, patient, and full of love, even when you may be tempted to argue with or rebel against family members.

19 For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.

Friday, March 19, 2010

Wind At Your Back #13

Jacob 2:18-19

Historical Setting

After the death of Nephi, the Lord instructed the prophet Jacob to go to the temple and warn the people of the consequences of their wickedness.

Doctrinal Teaching

Seek first for the things of God, and then use the riches of the world for doing good.

Self-Obliged Application

Help a nonmember appreciate the importance of the gospel in comparison to worldly riches.

Personal Application

Put your greatest effort into gaining a testimony of Christ; when you put Christ first, you will use whatever riches you may obtain to do good.

18 But before you seek for riches, seek ye for the kingdom of God.

19 And after ye have obtained a hope in Christ ye shall obtain riches, if ye seek them; and ye will seek them for the intent to do good---to clothe the naked, and to feed the hungry, and to liberate the captive, and administer relief to the sick and the afflicted.

Monday, March 15, 2010

All Things Bright and Beautiful #12

2 Nephi 32:3

Historical Setting

Nephi concluded his prophecy by expressing concern that people did not fully understand the doctrine of Christ.

Doctrinal Teaching

Angels speak by the power of the Holy Ghost, and if we will "feast upon the words of Christ", the words of Christ will tell us what we should do.

Self-obliged Application

Help a nonmember undersdtand that sincerely studying the Book of Mormon can lead to a testimonyu of its truthfulness.

Personal Application

Approach your study of the Book of Mormon as a spiritual feast. Read, study, visualize, and ponder this great scripture, and you will find solutions to many problems you are experiencing.

3 - Angels speak by the power of the Holy Ghost; wherefore, they speak the words of Christ. Wherefore, I said unto you, feast upon the words of Christ; for behold, the words of Christ will tell you all things what ye should do.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

All Things Bright and Beautiful #11

2 Nephi 9:28-29

Historical Setting

After having been called of God and ordained by Nephi, Jacob taught the Nephite people.

Doctrinal Teaching

To obtain knowledge is good if you follow the counsel of God.

Self-Obliged Application

Bear testimony that God's counsel is greater than man's wisdom.

Personal Application

Measure the things you learn in school by what you learn from the scriptures.

28 O that cunning plan of the evil one! O the vainness, and the frailties, and the foolishness of men! When they are learned they think they are wise, and they hearken not unto the counsel of God, for they set it aside, supposing they know of themselves, wherefore, their wisdom is foolishness and it profiteth them not. And they shall perish.

29 But to be learned is good if they hearken unto the counsels of God.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

All Things Bright and Beautiful #10

2 Nephi 2:27

Before he died, Lehi gave farewell counsel to his son Jacob and taught him about agency.

Doctrinal Teaching

Men are free to choose freedom and eternal life or captivity and death.

Self-Obliged Application

Explain to someone outside the Church that there are consequences to using agency.

Personal Application

Analyze the consequences of the choices you made today and the ways your choices affect your freedom.

Scripture Reading

27 Wherefore, men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man. And they are free to choose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and power of the devil; for he seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

All Things Bright and Beautiful #9

2 Nephi 2:25

Lehi gave farewell counsel to his son Jacob and taught him about Adam's Fall.

Doctrinal Teaching

Mortality was made possible by Adam's Fall; we exist so that we might experience joy.

Our Attitude Application

We explain ourselves to influence a new convert that birth on this earth was a result of Adam's Fall.

Personal Application

In your thoughts, your Church discussions, in teaching, and on occasion in your prayers, express appreciation for Adam and Eve.

Scripture Reading

25 Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

All Things Bright and Beautiful #8

1 Nephi 3:7

The Lord told Lehi to send his sons back to Jerusalem to get the brass plates from Laban.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Gospel Introduction's Historical Setting #7

3 Nephi 27:27

In His final instructions to the Nephite Twelve, Jesus commanded them to pattern their lives after His life.

Doctrinal Teaching

The Nephite Twelve were called to judge the Nephites. In order to make just judgments, they had to seek to live as Jesus lived.

Our Attitude Application

Help ourselves realize that Jesus is our model and that with His help we can pattern our lives after Him.

Personal Application

Study the life of Christ and pick out one of His characteristics to develop DAILY!

Scripture Reading

27 - And know ye that "ye shall be the judgment which I shall give unto you, which shall be just. Therefore, what manner of men ought ye to be? Verily I say unto you, even as I am."

Friday, March 5, 2010

Gospel Introduction's Historical Setting #6

Paul wrote his first letter to the Saints at Corinth from Philippi.


For I remember the word of God which saith by their works ye shall know them; for if their works be good, then they are good also. --MORONI 7:5

You are good.

But it is not enough just to be good.

You must be good for something.

You must contribute good to the world.

The world must be a better place for your presence.

And the good that is in you must be spread to others.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

The Selflessness Of Temple Work

Now therefore ye are no more strangers and foreigners, but fellowcitizens with the saints, and of the household of God; And are built upon the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Jesus Christ himself being the chief corner stone; In whom all the building fitly framed together groweth unto an holy temple in the Lord. -- EPHESIANS 2:19-21

Vicarious temple work for the dead more nearly approaches the vicarious sacrifice of the Savior Himself than any other work of which I know. No one comes with any expectation of thanks for the work which he or she does. It is given with love, without hope of compensation, or repayment. What a glorious principle!

Gospel Introduction's Historical Setting #5

Approximately four hundred years before the birth of Christ, Malachi spoke for the Lord.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Gospel Introduction's Historical Setting #4

Malachi 3:8-10

The disobedient kingdom of Judah had neglected to pay tithes and offerings to the Lord.

The Past, Present, And Future

"Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness." - DOCTRINE AND COVENANTS 58:27

How glorious is the past of this great cause. It is filled with heroism, courage, boldness, and faith.

How wondrous is the present as we move forward to bless the lives of people wherever they will hearken to the message of the servants of the Lord.

How magnificent will be the future as the Almighty rolls on His glorious work, touching for good all who will accept and live His gospel, and even reaching to the eternal blessing of His sons and daughters of all generations through the selfless work of those whose hearts are filled with love for the Redeemer of the world.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Your Best Self

Do all things . . . that ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world.


Keep faith with the best that is in you. Your own constant self-improvement will become as a polar star to those with whom you associate. They will remember longer what they saw in you than what they heard from you. Your attitude, your point of view can make such a tremendous difference.

Gospel Introduction's Historical Setting #3

In the eighth century b.c. Amos taught this truth while prophesying against the sins of Israel.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Gospel Introduction's Historical Setting #2

Daniel 2:44-45

After the wise men of the kingdom failed to interpret the meaning of the king's dream, Daniel was asked to interpret it.

Sunday, February 28, 2010

Gospel Introduction's Historical Setting #1

Ezekiel 37:15-17

During the kingdom of Judah's captivity in Babylon, Ezekiel prophesied of latter-day events.

Source: Scripture Mastery card

For Your Information that I will eventually insert 'their explanations' to each introduction from time to time.

See you tomorrow for issue 'G.I.H.S.' #2 (Reading of, see above Title)

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Someone Sent Me - Share 7

ratna kulkarni shared a message

Hope is the thing with feathers by Emily Dickinson.

'Hope is the thing with feathers.'

That perches in the soul, And sings the tune without the words, And never stops at all, And sweetest in the gale is heard; And sore must be the storm.

That could abash the little bird.

That kept so many warm.

I've heard it in the chillest land, And on the strangest sea; Yet, never, in extremity, It asked a crumb of me.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Someone Sent Me - Share 6

Raman Wadhwa shared a message

People are much like stained glass windows.

When the sun is shinning through them, they glow brightly and sparkle.

But when the sun goes down and it is dark and gloomy outside;

Their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within.


Thursday, February 18, 2010

Someone Sent Me - Share 5

Raman Wadhwa shared a message

The world is your mirror.

The good you find in others, is in you too.

The faults you find in others, are your faults as well.

After all, to recognize something you must know it.

The possibilities you see in others, are possible for you as well.

The beauty you see around you, is your beauty.

The world around you is a reflection, a mirror showing you the person you are.

To change your world, you must change yourself.

See the best in others, and you will be your best.

Give to others, and you will give to yourself.

Appreciate beauty, and you will be beautiful.

Admire creativity, and you will be creative.

Love, and you will be loved.

Seek to understand, and you will be understood.

Listen, and your voice will be heard.

Teach, and you will learn.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Chapter 6 - "The Fall Of Adam and Eve"

Adam and Eve Were the First to Come to Earth

* What evidence helps us know that Adam and Eve were valiant spirits?

God prepared this earth as a home for His children. Adam and Eve were chosen to be the first people to live on the earth (see Moses 1:34; 4:26). Their part in our Father's plan was to bring mortality into the world. They were to be the first parents. (See D&C 107:54-56.)

Adam and Eve were among our Father's noblest children. In the spirit world Adam was called Micael the archangel (See D&C 27:11; Jude 1:9). He was chosen by our Heavenly Father to lead the righteous in the battle against Satan (see Revelation 12:7-9). Adam and Eve were foreordained to become our first parents. The Lord promised Adam great blessings: "I have set thee to be at the head; a multitude of nations shall come of thee, and thou art a prince over them forever" (D&C 107:55).

Eve was "the mother of all living" (Moses 4:26). God brought Adam and Eve together in marriage because "it was not good that the man should be alone" (Moses 3:18; see also 1 Corinthians 11:11). She shared Adam's responsibility and will also share his eternal blessings.

* What can we learn from the examples of Adam and Eve?

The Garden of Eden

* Under what conditions did Adam and Eve live in the Garden of Eden?

When Adam and Eve were placed in the Garden of Eden, they were not yet mortal. In this state, "they would have had no children" (2 Nephi 2:23). There was no death. They had physical life because heir spirits were housed in physical bodies made from the dust of the earth (see Moses 6:59; Abraham 5:7). They had spiritual life because they were in the presence of God. They had not yet made a choice between good and evil.

God commanded them to have children. He said, "Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it, and have dominion over . . . every living thing that moveth upon the earth" (Moses 2:28). God told them they could freely eat of every tree in the garden except one, the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Of that tree God said, "In the day thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die" (Moses 3:17).

Satan, not knowing the mind of God but seeking to destroy God's plan, came to Eve in the Garden of Eden. He tempted her to eat of the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. He assured her that she and Adam would not die, but that they would "be as gods, knowing good and evil" (Moses 4:11). Eve yielded to the temptation and ate the fruit. When Adam learned what had happened, he chose to partake also. The changes that came pon Adam and Eve because they ate the fruit are called the Fall.

Adam and Eve's Separation from God

* What physical and spiritual changes occurred in Adam and Eve as a result of their transgression?

Because Adam and Eve had eaten the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, the Lord sent them out of the Garden of Eden into the world. Their physical condition changed as a result of their eating the forbidden fruit. As God had promised, they became mortal. They and their children would experience sickness, pain, and physical death.

Because of their transgression, Adam and Eve also suffered spiritual death. This meant they and their children could not walk and talk face to face with God. Adam and Eve and their children were separated from God both physically and spiritually.

Great Blessings Resulted from the Transgression

* How does the Fall provide opportunities for us to be come like our Heavenly Father?

Some people believe Adam and Eve committed a serious sin when they ate of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. However, latter-day scriptures help us understand that their Fall was a necessary step in the plan of life and a great blessing to all of us. Because of the Fall, we are blessed with physical bodies, the right to choose between good and evil, and the opportunity to gain eternal life. None of these privileges would have been ours had Adam and Eve remained in the garden.

After the Fall, Eve said, "Were it not for our transgression we never should have had seed (children), and never should have known good and evil, and the joy of our redemption, and the eternal life which God giveth unto all the obedient" (Moses 5:11).

The prophet Lehi explained:

"And now, behold, if Adam had not transgressed he would not have fallen (been cut off from the presence of God), but he would have remained in the Garden of Eden. And all things which were created must have remained in the same state in which they were after they were created...."

"And they would have had no children; wherefore they would have remained in a state of innocence, having no joy, for they knew no misery; doing no good, for they knew no sin."

"But behold, all things have been done in the wisdom of him who knoweth all things."

"Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy" (2 Nephi 2:22-25).

* Why do you think it is important to know about the Fall and how it influences us?

Additional Scriptures

* 1 Nephi 5:11; 2 Nephi 2:20 (Adam and Eve first parents, family)

* 2 Nephi 2:14-21 (opposition and the Fall; life a probation)

* 2 Nephi 2:22-26 (Fall part of the plan of salvation)

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Someone Sent Me - Share Four

Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could.

Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; Forget them as soon as you can.

Tomorrow is a new day; Begin it well and serenely, And with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

Monday, January 11, 2010

Someone Sent Me - Share Three

Professional Summary

"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight mediocrity that knows nor victory nor defeat."

I promise myself :

• To be so strong that nothing can disturb my peace of mind.

• To talk health, happiness and prosperity to every person I meet.

• To make all my friends feel that there is something in them.

• To look at the sunny side of everything and make my optimism come true.

• To think only of the best, to work only for the best, and to expect only the best.

• To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.

• To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

• To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give a smile to every living creature I meet.

• To give so much time to the improvement of myself that I will have no time to criticize others.

• To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble. Let's leave the words away and start the action to prove who we are.

Someone Sent Me - Share Two

Ashok nair shared a message

Having shot a deer, Ben and Arthur began dragging it by the tail to Arthur's trailer. On the way, they were stopped by a policeman. "Let me see your hunting licenses boys," he said.

When he saw that everything was in order he asked if he could give them some advice.

"Sure!" the hunters agreed."Well boys, I think that you would find it a lot easier to drag that deer by the horns and not the tail."

"Aye, O.K. and thanks," said the lads. After about five minutes Arthur said, "Ben, dragging by the horns is sure a lot easier, eh?"

"Yes, you're right," said Ben, "but have you noticed that we are getting further away from the trailer?***** "

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Friendship Information

"Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend."

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Someone Sent Me - Share One

1. Everyone has the right to be stupid. But some people just abuse the privilege.

2. Don't play stupid with me! Because ya know I'm better at it.

3. Be careful of reading health books, you might die of a misprint.

4. A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it's the stupid ones who need all the advice.

5. If barbie is so popular, then why do people have to buy all her friends?

6. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

7. I poured spot remover on my dog & now he's gone.

8. They say that hard work never hurts anyone. But then again, why take the chance?

9. Everyone wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

10. Forget love, I'd rather fall in chocolate.